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    You have a Box. You are not your Box. Neither are they their Box.

  • Your Box

    A COMPLEX CONSTRUCT

    The ‘Box’ is the complex assemblage of the thoughtware that we use to interact with the world. Our thoughtware is what we use to think with. Our thoughtware is our belief system, our conclusions, our stories, our thinking patterns, our assumptions and expectations, our decisions and so on. Other work would call it the Ego, our psychology, our character, our personality. In Possibility Management, we call it the Box. We are mostly not aware of our thoughtware. We have not been trained to think about what we are thinking with. Modern western education does not educate us in looking at what we look at the world with. Investigating our Box is using a magnifying glass to examine the glasses that we use to look at and get impressions from the world.

    A 360 DEGREE FILTER

    Think of the Box as a box in which you stand in, surrounded by the vast unlimited possibilities available in the Universe. Whatever makes it into your Box is what is possible for you. The possibilities that make it inside your Box is what you have right now in terms of relationship, family, job, money, Love, time, authenticity, etc... Everything that which is outside of your Box you cannot see, sense, experience, imagine, describe, or create.

     

    Your Box is a filter between you and the vast unlimited potential ‘out there’. The Box filters what you can express and what you can experience: what you hear, what you see, what you smell, what you notice. For example, a dairy farmer can look at the herd of cows and know instantly which one is sick, which one is pregnant, which ones are healthy, which one needs water, and so on. Whereas a city man would only see ‘cows’ without any finer distinction between them. We would say the dairy farmer as an expanded Box compared to the city man in the domains of cows.

     

    Through simple observations we can discover that the Box serves to buffer us from the unknown. What is in the Box is known. What is outside of the Box is unknown. The purpose of our Box is therefore to give us protection, comfort, self-definition, and security. When it comes to the bottom line, the purpose of our Box is to insure our survival.

     

    We create our Box as children. As children we come up with the best solution to survive when faced with a given problem. As it works, we integrate that particular response as our ‘normal’ way of being. The ego is created. Some children identify the best solution as being the nice girl/nice boy that always pleases their parents. Others realize that playing small, being invisible, disappearing is the best solution to face authority figures. Others again classify that being a rebellious child gives them some form of attention - better negative attention than no attention at all. Over the years of working with people we have come to recognize about eighteen standard Box defense strategies. All of them are effective. Please find the list at 18 Boxes Bubble (http://18boxes.mystrikingly.com/). The list is not intended to be systematic or all inclusive. The value of this list is reading through it to recognize which defense strategies your Box uses. You may also recognize a number of your friends in this list.

    AN EGGSHELL

    A bird’s eggshell is designed to protect the baby bird until it can stand on its own two feet. A chrysalis is designed to protect a caterpillar’s transformation into something that can fly. Likewise, the Box is designed to defend us until we are ready to shift from childhood to our life as a free and natural adult human being.

     

    The transition from childhood to adulthood is intended to take place at around fifteen years of age. We are not structurally capable of taking responsibility before fifteen. But, tragically, our culture does not provide a rite of passage for us. If we do not go through the process that changes the purpose of our Box from its originally defensive and purely survival-based purpose to a mature, expansive, self-development, evolutionary purpose, then our Box, which once protected us, then becomes our prison.

    THE PURPOSE

    If your Box is dedicated to defending itself, then the purpose of your actions will be to protect your positions, blame or attack others, compete for resources, justify yourself, regard yourself as “right” and others as “wrong,” feel resentment, and as a last resort destroy or isolate. These strategies are the foundation for creating ordinary gameworlds serving shadow principles. If you change the purpose of your Box from defending itself to expanding itself, then your actions will have a completely different quality. A Box dedicated to expanding itself directs your actions toward exploring new territory, going beyond restrictive limits, self-development, discovery, trying new things, learning, growth, welcoming surprises, experimenting, and so on. Reading a book such as this and practicing with the suggested experiments is a Box-expanding action.

     

    Our Box long ago concluded that if it can survive, then we can survive. That ancient decision still holds dominance until we radically change the game we are playing. Our Box is extremely resilient, fast, clever, subtle, and justified in its self-defense. Without us making intelligent conscious efforts to create alternative options, our Box will minimize chances to play a different game and will control the way we show up in the world for the rest of our days. A defensive Box does not let anyone get in closer to you than the limit of itself. It does not even let you go to the edge and explore what is beyond. If you attempt to move towards the edge, your Box screams “What are you doing? What are you doing? If you go there, we will die! Die! Do you hear me? Die! Go back inside! Now!” Without the possibility of traveling to the edge of yourself, new games are never revealed to you.

  • You And Your Box

    From Possibility Management Trainer Katharina Kaifler.

  • Liquid State Website, StartOver.xyz, Possibility Management

    WARNING!

    WARNING: You will encounter unavoidable Liquid States plus authentic Healing and Transformation during 'Box Expansion' experiences!

     

    This is not a joke. Changing a solid object - for example, your Survival Strategy Box with all it many moving Parts - from one shape into another shape, occurs through a fluidic transition period known as the 'Liquid State'.

     

    During a Liquid State, many things once believed to be solid, true, or real, melt down and rearrange themselves with each other, both within you and around you. In addition to that, some things fall away, and some completely new and probably unexpected things may suddenly appear.

     

    Please choose wisely to proceed with reading these StartOver.xyz websites or engaging in these Experiments, including the Expand The Box (ETB) Training.

     

    The thing is, this stuff actually unfolds your potentials and creates a new future for you to step into as an Adult.

     

    If you love the life that you have and the ways that you are, if you love what is happening now in your relationships and in the world around you: DO NOT PROCEED!

     

    Stop right here and return to watching TV series for your entertainment.

     

    Initiation, Healing, and Transformation is not for everyone.

     

    Perhaps it is not for you.

     

    The choice is yours, and YOU are responsible for your choices. Irresponsibility is a Fantasy World.

     

    To understand further what we mean by the term 'Liquid State', and what it might mean for you personally, please explore the Liquid State website.

     

    Thank you for your cooperation...

  • BOX BASICS

    A Talk by Clinton Callahan

  • Expand Your Box

    'Expanding your Box' means to acquire real behavior possibilities that were not available before.

     

    Two methods have been discovered to effectively expand the Box, a 'push' method and a 'pull' method.

     

    The 'Push Method' comes from Werner Heisenberg.

     

    The 'Pull Method' comes from Santa Claus.

    THE 'PUSH' METHOD OF EXPANDING YOUR BOX

    Werner Heisenberg (died 1976) was a world-class Scientist who formulated many of the original mathematical models for quantum physics.

     

    The 'Push Method' of Box Expansion derives from what has come to be known as 'The Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle'. In layman’s terminology, the 'Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle' says that details of a situation cannot be known without interfering in the situation.

     

    In other words, the closer you look at something, the more you change it.

     

    This effect is terrible in quantum physics, but is fantastic for expanding the Box.

     

    This means, the closer you observe and investigate the structure, purpose and technology of your Box, the more it unfolds in expanding fluidity founded in clarity, love, possibility and evolution. Voila! Box Expansion!

    THE 'PULL METHOD OF EXPANDING YOUR BOX

    Santa Clause (still living...) is a world-class Wizard who - from time-to-time - swings by your place on his sleigh, pops down the chimney, and opens up his endlessly big bag of gifts, inviting you to reach inside and take anything you want for free.

     

    The 'Pull Method' of Box Expansion is derived from what has come to be known as 'Gifts Of Unknown Things' Principle (the title of a recommended book by Lyall Watson, Matrix Code BOOK0165.00 for StartOver.xyz). In layman's terminology, The 'Gifts Of Unknown Things Principle' says that receiving a surprise gift with seemingly magical powers will induce you to do whatever it takes to learn how to use it.

     

    In other words, to learn to make use of the magical gifts, you will are tempted to enter new territory.

     

    Fear of the unknown is usually what stops people from undertaking their own Hero's Journey Quest, but it is the the most attractive catalyst in real-life Transformation.

     

    This means, the open toolbox of transformational tools, thoughtmaps, distinctions and processes we offer you at Expand The Box training is inspiring enough for you to try new behaviors. Since the tools actually work, you keep going! Voila! Box expansion!

  • Your Box's NITs

    100 NITs EXAMPLES

    A 'louse' (plural: 'lice') is a tiny insect that thrives in hair and feathers. The human head louse, or Pediculus humanus capitis, is a parasitic insect that is happy to live on your head, eyebrows, and eyelashes. Head lice feed on human blood several times a day and live close to the human scalp. They can lay up to eight eggs per day on individual hairs. Lice eggs are called 'nits'. Lice are irritating, to say the least (also on dogs, cats, birds, mice, hamsters, monkeys, etc.). This is why you may have seen birds or monkeys helping pick off the lice and nits from each other.

     

    In Possibility Management we have adopted the word 'Nit' from the English term 'nitpicking', first used in 1956, which means 'to give too much attention to unimportant details, looking for small errors or faults, especially in order to criticize unnecessarily'.

     

    In PM the term 'Nit' represents each person's Box Habits that can be so irritating, most especially irritating to others. Nits cause families to argue, clans to feud, partners to yell at each other or split up, even cultural or religious gameworlds to go to war against each other.

     

    Nits are the source of the central consciousness evolution practice as defined by George Ivanovich Gurdjieff as: "Enduring the unpleasant manifestations of others."

     

    Becoming aware of the consequences of your own Nits, as merely Nits, gives you and others many valuable opportunities, such as:

    Below is a list of 100 Examples of Nits.

     

    How many of these do you have as structures on your Box?

     

    How many of these irritate your Box to no end if they are on other Boxes?

     

    Please remember, your Nits are not right (or wrong). And also, other people's Nits are not wrong (or right). They are all Nits, dead mechanical manifestations of your Box design.

     

    The objective of working with Nits is NOT to try to change the other person so all their bothersome behaviors vanish and you can 'live in peace'.

     

    Did you ever try to change someone else? (Yes.) Did it work? (No.)

     

    This is why detecting Nits, and naming them as 'Nits', is such a powerful Practice. Once a Nit is classified as a Nit, instead of creating "You are such an idiot!" Reactivity, it creates so much new Possibility in your Relating.

    100 EXAMPLE NITs

    1. When to empty the trashcan (e.g., For one Box a trashcan must ABSOLUTELY be emptied
    if it has anything in it at all. For another Box the trashcan is regretfully emptied
    only when not another thing can possibly be stuffed into it and pieces overflow
    onto the floor. Neither is right. Neither is wrong. The perceptions and the
    associated thoughts and feelings are all propelled by Nits!)
    2. How to hang the laundry
    3. Where to put things in the refrigerator
    4. How to know when the spaghetti is ready
    5. How much salt to put in the potatoes
    6. How loud is loud (music, arguing kids, television)
    7. How much is enough light to read by
    8. How strong is good coffee
    9. How to fold the sheets while making the bed
    10. Which boundaries are necessary for healthy children
    11. How to parallel park the car
    12. The best procedure for drying the dishes
    13. The proper way to squeeze toothpaste out of the tube
    14. When is the toothpaste tube actually empty
    15. When do the windows or mirrors actually need cleaning

    16. Whose job is it to pay the bills, maintain the cars, get rid of bugs or rodents,
    change the light bulbs
    17. How friendly to be with the neighbors
    18. How much time with the relatives is too much time with the relatives
    19. What words to use when answering the telephone
    20. How to clean the toilet when it is dirty
    21. Who cleans the toilet when it is dirty
    22. Do toilets even get dirty?
    23. When to use credit cards; how much cash to carry
    24. How much suntan a person needs to be healthy or beautiful
    25. How to dress appropriately for each occasion
    26. How long is needed in the bathroom
    27. When to arrive: early, exactly on time, five minutes late, twenty minutes late
    28. What constitutes a good breakfast
    29. When to eat lunch or dinner
    30. How much fat around the middle is too much fat
    31. The importance of self-improvement or spiritual work
    32. The value of art; what to hang in the hallway
    33. How many knick-knacks to have around the house
    34. The importance of knowing the news
    35. The entertainment value of sports
    36. How to load the dishwasher
    37. When does the car need cleaning
    38. How much is the dog a member of the family; where does the dog sleep
    39. How to play tennis together: to win or to enjoy the exercise and the
    company?
    40. How to pull the weeds, cut the hedges, plant the flowers; are there weeds?
    41. How badly cat piss smells
    42. How much is enough ice cream
    43. How much is too much sugar for the kids
    44. How to decorate the living room
    45. What books or magazines are worth keeping around the house
    46. How many extra plastic bags or empty cardboard boxes do we need
    47. How many rubber bands to keep and where
    48. What should go on the refrigerator
    49. Who are our friends
    50. What constitutes fun
    51. How much time off equates to a vacation
    52. How important is politics

    53. How much effort to use recycling
    54. Where to go for a good restaurant meal
    55. What makes a good melon
    56. What makes a good man
    57. What should a functional desk look like
    58. How to organize the tax papers
    59. What to do about writing Christmas thank-you cards
    60. What about the children’s school grades
    61. When is something dusty enough to require dusting or vacuuming
    62. Who to call to personally wish them a Happy Birthday
    63. Do we say a prayer or not say a prayer before meals
    64. Do we get married; what last name does the wife take; wedding rings
    65. What is a good movie
    66. How late is too late to stay up
    67. What is a funny joke
    68. What is good sex
    69. What is too much or not enough sex
    70. How much is too much television; how many televisions to have
    71. Who decides how we drive there; who reads the map
    72. When to shovel the snow; how perfectly should it be shoveled
    73. What to keep in the freezer
    74. Where to clean the fish
    75. How many packages of chips to buy
    76. Where to shop for the best grocery deals
    77. Floss teeth before or after brushing; floss teeth at all
    78. Where to put the dirty clothes; when are clothes actually dirty
    79. When to fill the car up with gas; where; who checks the oil
    80. How many pairs of shoes to own
    81. How many movies are too many movies; buy or rent
    82. Where to keep notepaper and pens
    83. Where to keep the keys
    84. To color or not color the hair; makeup or no makeup; how long hair
    85. Sexual apparatus or not; sexual stimulants or not
    86. How much sleep is really needed
    87. To go to church or not; to belong to a church or not
    88. How many vitamins to take
    89. How much time to spend exercising
    90. How long to stay on the telephone
    91. How late should the kids stay out

    92. Should our daughter have an older boyfriend
    93. What clothes are decent for a teenager
    94. How much money to owe to banks or other people
    95. How much is too much alcohol, gambling, or drugs
    96. How much emergency food or supplies to keep around the house
    97. How much insurance to have
    98. When to mow the lawn; when to cut the shrubbery
    99. Are potatoes and carrots better peeled or with the skins on
    100. What constitutes flirting

  • Conversation With A Box

  • Box Technology Experiments

    To get to know your own Box

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    IDENTIFY YOUR BOX

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.01

    Through years of research, we have found that survival strategy box designs come in about 18 different standard styles. In your Possibility Team or 3cell read the 18 boxes website together.

    Then scan each other for which one of the standard boxes you are. It could be that you are a mix of 2 or 3 boxes, usually not more than that. Be clear and specific with examples of how this specific box shows up in the behavior, speech and interactions of the person who is being scanned. Play conscious theater to make the box obvious.

    Write down in your Beep! Book what kind of box you have built for yourself.

     

    After the meeting, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.01 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Points.

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    IDENTIFY ALL THE 18 STANDARD BOXES IN OTHERS

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.02

    This experiment is to sit, for an hour in a shopping mall, a park, a cafe or a bar and scan people for their box as they go by. Which one of the 18 standard boxes are they using? Sit until you have identifed each one of the 18 boxes in different people. Be clear and specific about how it shows up in the way they walk, talk, look around, hold their shopping bags, go with the dog and so on.

    This is a fun experiment to do together with another person. Stay neutral observers! Do not let your Gremlin use this as a gossiping feeding frenzy.

     

    After doing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.02 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    OBSERVE YOUR BOX'S NITS AND YOUR NITS REACTION

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.03

    Review the list of 100 Nits above, and write down two lists in your Beep! Book:

    1. NITS OF MY BOX

    2. NITS OF OTHERS THAT DRIVE MY BOX CRAZY

     

    Each one of your Nits (see the context section above) AND each one of your Nit Reactions came from somewhere.

     

    This Experiment is to choose 10 of your Nits and 10 of your Nit Reactions. Bring them to your Possibility Team. Sit across from somebody and whatever it takes to find exactly when and where they came from. What incident or interaction happened in that moment you Decided to build that particular Nit or the Nit Reaction into your Box? The other person can ask that question over and over again until you get to the origin of the Nit and Nit Reaction.

     

    Do not try to change anything about the Nits or Nit Reactions at this point. This is a time for Self Observation and for letting the unconscious pain or pain-avoidance technique become painfully conscious.

     

    Please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.03 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 2 Matrix Points.

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    BE NEUROTIC ABOUT YOUR NITS

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.04

    For this experiment use the two list of NITs you made in the previous experiment.

     

    For one day make sure that all your prefered NITs are fullfilled. Be absolutely neurorotic about how your Box wants things to be. Whenever your partner or the people you live with change anything to how their Box wants things to be (for example the famous toilet paper roll), do not start a fight or low drama. Simply change it back to the way your Box preferres.

     

    Notice how pleased your Box is and how pleased the other boxes are. Notice the differences and similarities between your Boxes. Notice how these can cause either fighting or harmony between Boxes.

     

    After completing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.04 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    BOX TECHNOLOGY AND YOUR BELIEFS

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.05

    Beliefs are band-aids that you put on inside your box to cover up something that you do not understand, the unknown, or something you do not have words for. This is scary stuff so a belief's purpose is to cover up the hole and avoid feeling your fear. There is nothing wrong or bad with beliefs and the consequence of beliefs is fanaticism, because if anyone confronts your beliefs you need to defend them otherwise you would feel the fear behind. A belief is not connected to reality.

     

    Your box is decorated with beliefs. "War is necessary for peace.", "Veganism will save the world.", "A man has to be strong.", "If I am a good girl all my life God will send me to heaven.", "I believe it is going to rain.", ...

    They have a certain rigidity and prevent you from taking action in a certain way. If you believe a man has to be strong you will prevent yourself from being vulnerable at any time.

     

    For 5 days write down all the beliefs that you detect in your Beep!-Book. Then take some time to write down 10 things you could believe. Take the second list to your Possibility Team, pick one and try to convince your Team for 20 minutes of this belief. Hold a speech, why everyone should believe in this. You can start a new religion here! Notice how anyone can belief anything about anything.

     

    After completing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.05 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 2 Matrix Points.

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    DISCOVER YOUR BOX' POSITIONALITY

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.06

    Positionality is different than taking a stand. By taking on a position you lock your being into the prison of that position. This prevents you from playing full out and growing beyond your box' positionality. You can take a position by siding with a political party, a movement (like feminism, veganism, stoicism,...), a brand of clothing, a sports club or in investment, child raising, health, education,... Your box defends your positionality by being right about it and making the positions of others wrong. Notice that your box would rather have no friends than give it up your positionality.

     

    Go to one of your families events like a wedding, a birthday celebration or any other get-together. Engage actively in 10 conversations with 10 different people. You do not have to know them.

    - In 5 conversations notice every time you try to be right and make somebody else wrong. What is the position behind it that you try to defend? Try not to change anything about your Positionality.

    - In 5 conversations agree with the Positionality of the other person. Do not defend yourself. There is nothing to defend, when you do not have a position.

     

    After completing this experiment please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.06 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 2 Matrix Points.

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    DESIGN A SOCIETY WITH A MAXIMAL NUMBER OF PREJUDICES

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.07

    Prejudice is a story that includes some people being superior and others being inferior. By honing your own prejudices against someone you think you know who the other person is.

     

    Write a 3 to 5 pages fiction short-story about a society you invent that has a maximum number of prejudices. The story includes a couple relating with each other in that society. How do the prejudices of the society affect the couples relating? What prejudices do they have with each other?

    After you write the story, please share your treasure with the world by publishing it on medium.

     

    After publishing your story, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.07 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 2 Matrix Points.

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    DEFEND YOUR BOX' REASONS

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.08

    Reasons are the most powerful way to defend your Box. It is widely accepted in modern culture that who ever can give a good enough reason can get out of anything. Reasons avoid responsibility. Without a reason you are unpredictable and practically insane.

     

    For one entire day from the moment you get up until you go to bed at night put a Reason onto every move you make. Explain why you are drinking water now, why you shift in your chair, why you open the window, why you wear the blue shirt today, why you did not salt the food, why you want to talk to someone, why you scratch your ear,...

    Become excruitiatingly aware how precise your Box wants to be in its Reason making. Doesn't that feel sane now?

     

    After completing this experiment please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.08 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    USE YOUR BOX TO NOT KNOW

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.09

    A Projection is based on your assumption that you know the person (who they really are) you are projecting on. Since you know who the other person is, then your box can function in the usual way. "He is a caring father", "She is a cheater", "He always drinks coffee in the morning", "She loves me",...

     

    Your knowing about a person or a situation that you are projecting is an exact description of your barrier to being Present. Use the knowing as a wake up call to be in the unknown together. The way to do this is each time the 'knowing' arises in you, simply don't go there.

     

    This experiment is to stand across somebody look at them, keep breathing and tell the person: "I just realized I don't know anything about you. Let's have lunch together" and the entire lunch do not know who you are interacting with. Whenever a Projection of knowing arises in the space between you go back to not knowing.

     

    Hint 1: Share about your fear of not knowing who the other person is.

    Hint 2: Don't tell too many stories from the past. Speak from the present.

     

    Before going to bed that same day, write down in your Beep! Book how much 'knowing' things about people limits you from discovering things about them.

     

    After having that conversation, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.09 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    ANALYZE HOW YOUR BOX IS SO COMMITTED TO MAKING ASSUMPTIONS

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.10

    Assumptions are the soil for expectactions to grow in because you believe your asssumption is true. It happens so fast. You think that the other people know exactly what you think and you think you know what the other people think. You make assumptions all the time about the world and other people.

     

    For example:

    • You assume that the postman delivers your post where it needs to go
    • You assume that your partner understood what you just said
    • You assume that what you put in your refrigirator will be still in the refrigirator when you come back by the end of the day
    • You assume that the other person will still remember the agreement you made a week ago
    • You assume that your partner knows how to take care of the kids

    Write down in your Beep! Book the first 25 assumptions that you make. Don't be surprised if it takes you less than a couple of hours.

    Decide that all of your assumptions are false and declare a monthlong "Assumption-free time". Make no assumptions for a month.

    Whenever you catch yourself making an assumption, without punishing yourself go back to the assumption-free space. Staying free of assumptions takes more communication that you are used to in your daily life. This means you probably need to call people up to ask them if your agreement from one week ago is still valid. Or reassure yourself that your partner heard what you just said by asking them to complete the communication. Or you need to call in the post office if they really send out your letter to overseas. Or you need to show your partner in detail how you want them to hold your child.

     

    After completing this experiment please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.10 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 2 Matrix Points.

     

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    WITHDRAW 100 EXPECTATIONS IN RELATING WITH YOUR PARTNER

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.11

    You are clever. Because you are clever, you assume that all these assumptions you make are true. This is how you turn them into expectations.

    You assume your partner knows how to set the boundary with the neighbor who turns the music up every night so that you cannot sleep well. You assume he knows how to set the boundary and then you assume your assumption is true. Now you expect him to be able to set this boundary.

     

    If he fails your whole worldview collapses. The picture you had about your partner collapses. You resent him to not be able to fullfill your expectation. This is so painful for you that you want to take revenge on him. A perfect Gremlin feeding frenzy!

     

    In this experiment you look at your relating with your partner. Write down every single expectation you find and do not stop until you find 100. Whenever you find one, stop with what you are doing and immediately call up your partner and take the expectation back with the following process:

     

    1) Choose one well-justified expectation that you have held about your partner for some time.

    2) Say “I have been holding onto an expectation of you that _______,” (fill in the blank with the specifics of your expectation)

    3) Say, “I withdraw FOREVER the expectation that you _______.”

    4) Then say nothing. Calmly wait in the new space you have just created. Stay present. Stay connected. Let the feelings come up. Keep breathing.

     

    After completing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.11 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 2 Matrix Points.

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    BOX TECHNOLOGY AND YOUR RESENTMENTS

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.12

     

    Please do the previous experiment before starting this one. I expect you to do that.

     

    Now take a look at Resentment. Someone did not behave the way we wanted them to so our Gremlin gets to have a delicious feast of Revenge. Resentment is an emotional reaction that you feel when you believe in a particular interpretation that you made up about something.

     

    This experiment is about feeling the resentment that you unsconsiouly create from your unfulfilled expectations. Take out your Beep! Book and go to your writings about your expectations towards your partner and pick out 3 of them. Call up another Possibilitator and ask them listen to you while you do this experiment. (30 min)

    Then express the resentment you feel when each of the expectations is not fullfilled. Express the thoughts of revenge, confusion, hatred, express how the body tenses up in resentment, express the way you energetically and physically withdraw from your partner, express all the emotions in the resentment. This will mostly be anger, mixed with sadness, fear or joy.

     

    Notice how familiar and comfortable this is for your Box.

     

    After doing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.12 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    BOX TECHNOLOGY AND YOUR FANTASY WORLDS

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.13

    This Experiment has two parts.

     

    1) Together with your Possibility Team watch "Planet of the Humans" by Jeff Gibbs. Let yourself touch base with reality. You will feel something. Use the community of your Team to let your heart feel. Let everyone speak after the documentary ends.

     

    2) Make a 5 - 8 minute video of yourself telling the Fantasy World story of the modern culture. Speak about how wonderful this Fantasy World is (the American Dream, all the ways to entertain youself, becoming rich, being beautiful and liked and cool, good intentions, the linear life plan, retirement homes, school, being sucessfull and being happy,...).

     

    Paint the picture clearly about how living in Hope, Nostalgia, Denial, Obsession, Projections, Expectations, Positionality, Reasons, Beliefs, Prejudices, Justifications, Resentment, Assumptions and Conclusions in modern culture is creating a Fantasy World that has nothing to do with reality. Speak about the consequences for human potential and planet Earth.

     

    Put your video on Youtube.

     

    After completing the entire experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.13 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 2 Matrix Points.

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    LIST THE STORIES YOUR BOX HOLDS ABOUT MEN

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.14

    Your Box has stories about men, about what and who they should be, do or have.

     

    A man is stronger than a woman. Men do not show their feelings. Men are good with fixing things. Men have to make money. Men are the providers for their families. Men are contextholders. All men are assholes. Without a man a woman is worth nothing. Men always want sex. Men need to create war to entertain themselves. Men must protect women. My man holds space for me in our relating. Men must atone for "the sins of the patriarchy" and not repress or control women in any way, even if we are being treated poorly. After all, real men are tough enough to not be emotionally impacted. ...

     

    Sit on a public bench, take out your Beep! Book and observe men passing by for one hour. Make a list of 50 stories your Box holds about men.

     

    If you are a man, notice the pain of having these Box stories about other men dictating your own life. If you are a woman, notice the pain of not being able to relate to men who don't fit your Box's description. What other stories can you make up about men? How would that affect your relating to men?

     

    After listing your 50 stories, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.14 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    LIST THE STORIES YOUR BOX HOLDS ABOUT WOMEN

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.15

    Your Box has stories about women, about what and who they should be, do or have.

     

    Women are good with feelings. A woman needs to take care of the children. Women need to be beautiful. Women like gossiping. Women are weaker than men. Women need a strong man at their side telling them what to do or how to be. ...

     

    Go to a shopping mall, take out your Beep! Book and observe women passing by for one hour. Make a list of 50 stories your Box holds about women.

     

    If you are a woman, notice the pain of having these Box stories about other women dictating your own life. If you are a man, notice the pain of not being able to relate to women who don't fit your Box's description. What other stories can you make up about women? How would that affect your relating to women?

     

    After listing your 50 stories, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.15 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    BOX TECHNOLOGY AND YOUR ROLES

    Matrix Code SPARK187.00

     

    Download SPARK187 - 'you do not have roles, you have a life'. Read it at your next Possibility Team meeting and do the experiments together.

     

    After doing the experiments, please register Matrix Code SPARK187.00 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    CREATE A BOX INTERACTION THEATER

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.16

    Write a short theatre piece, not longer than 5 minutes, involving at least two characters with completely different Boxes who are speaking to each other. Make it a conscious Box to Box conversation.

    How do they relate? What do they say? What do they not say? For inspiration watch Eddie Izzard's Dressed To Kill.

    After you write your script, take it to your Possibility Team and create the theater togeter. Film yourselves playing. Dress the way they would dress, talk the way they would, mimic their facial expressions and body movements.

     

    After uploading the video on youtube, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.16 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    BOX TECHNOLOGY AND YOUR REACTIVITY

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.17

    Buttons are designed into the surface of your Box as survival strategy reaction patterns. Buttons are automatic reactions. They get pushed - even unintentionally - by another Box that has a different shape than your Box (different rules, habits, assumptions, expectations, decisions, etc.) When you are with people who irritate you, your Buttons get pushed. Anybody can push your Buttons. Watch the Gremlins of children push the Buttons on their parents' Boxes over and over, just for entertainment.

     

    This experiment is about discovering your Buttons. The way to notice that your reactivity is coming from one of your Buttons being pushed is to use non-judgemental Self Observation. Sooner or later you will find the Button by recognizing the repeated emotional reactivity in the same circumstances.

     

    Build a cardboard Box and carry it around for 3 days. For each Button you detect during that time draw a little circle on the cardboard in which you write what the Button is about. Find at least 20 Buttons.

     

    After doing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.17 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    SOLVE YOUR OWN BOX PROBLEMS BY SHIFTING IDENTITY

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.18

    Is it really a problem or is your Box making it a problem? Consider the possibility of having no problem. You can live in a space where there is no problem. One of the most effective ways to shift out of having a problem is to shift identity.

     

    For the next 5 days, everytime you run into a problem, use it as an opportunity to wake up and Shift Identity. Do a real 360 degrees spin and become someone different, someone who does not think that this situation is a problem. This new identity has different ressources, a different way to use their voice, their body moves differently, they have a different sense of humor than your Box' boring self-centered repetative identity.

     

    So the next time you catch yourself saying "There is no more dish soap!" shift identity and become an elder who can improvise their own instant dish soap using ingredients from the kitchen, or a scout who can use the charcoal from the fireplace as a substitute for dish soap.

     

    After doing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.18 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    LET YOUR BOX SPEAK ABOUT A PROJECT WHICH IS IMPORTANT FOR YOU

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.19

    Your Box has a specific way of speaking. It includes assumptions, reasons, logic, expectations, conclusions, arguements and facts. The way your Box speaks is very different to when you let your Being speak or your Gremlin or your Archetypal Lineage or the Unknown.

    In your next Possibility Team, get togehter in groups of 3. One person is the speaker, the other listens, and the third person is the coach. Take turns. For 15 minutes as a speaker you talk about a project that is dear to you. This experiment is to get an experiential sense of when your Box speaks versus when another part speaks. The job of the Coach is to give you direct Feedback on what part of you is speaking now "That is your Box", "That is your Gremlin", and the Coach can even request to hear other parts of you that have not spoken "I want to hear something from your Being/your anger/your archetypal lineage".

    The Listeners job is to just listen.

    Start and end the 15 minutes with speaking from your Box.

     

    After doing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.19 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    CHANGE YOUR SPEAKING

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.20

    The behaviors of your Box are repetative and mechanical. You took on a way to speak, to walk, to move, to think from the family and culture you were born into to survive in these circumstances. Congratulations! You have survived! Now it is time to try something else to get access to more options to choose from. It is possible to shift your Box' purpose from survival to living. One of the ways to do that is to use your Box' limitations as a diving board. Beware, this could be more fun than your Box is able to tolerate!

     

    For a week, 3 times a day, change your speaking. Speak from a different character, from a different country or time, from with a different religion than yours, sexual orientation, from a differently-abled person, with a speech impediment, from someone who is missing something, or is a teacher, or doctor, or president, ... Speak for 10 minutes. Then shift back into "normal", meaning back into the speech pattern of your own Box.

     

    If someone gets irritated, share with them distinctions about their Box and invite them to do the experiment with you.

     

    After doing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.20 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    IMITATE ANOTHER PERSONS BOX

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.21

    Pick one of your friends or house mates and imitate their neurotic small subtle behaviours for a whole day. Walk like them, talk to the person on the phone like them, fold your clothes like them, make lunch like they do (the amount of food, the quality, the spices they use, the way they clean up after themselves or not,...), dress like them,..

    Tell them that you are doing an experiment and learning to be more flexible with yourself. Notice how your Boxes are different. Notice how your Box immediately wants to judge them for their Box behavior.

     

    After doing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.21 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    AGREE WITH THE BOXES AROUND YOU FOR A DAY

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.22

    Boxes want to be right. This makes total sense as your box is dedicated to your survival. Firstly it is dedicated to its own survival. Because when your Box survives, you survive. When your survival mechanism survive, your survival is guaranteed. This is why the Box tries to be right and defend itself through arguing.

    Here comes a counter intuitive Box experiment for you.

     

    During a whole day you agree with everybody. In every conversation with someone agree with their reactions, conclusions, assumptions, expectations and projections. Say Yes to them. Do not defend yourself. Have no opinion. Why do you want to have opinions in the first place?

    If you do not let your Gremlin use this as a gossiping frenzy you might be able to feel the pain of the defensiveness of the Box.

     

    After doing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.22 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

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    BECOME AMIDETROUS

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.22

    This is a one month experiment. Make a list of 10 things that you usually do using your dextrous hand. For example: using the mouse pad on your laptop, tying a knot, taking notes on your Beep! Book, brushing your teeth, using the fork,...

     

    During the first week, choose one thing from the list and use your less dextrous hand to do it every time during the whole week instead of using your dextrous hand. In the second week, add one thing from the list, while keeping the first challenge one as well. Third week, add a third element. By the fourth week you have 3 actions you are training your less dextrous hand in and you add a fourth one. Keep going.

     

    Notice how using your less dextrous hand affects your Center, your Presence, your Attention. Write an article about what you've learned from using your ambidextrous hand and publish it for everyone on Medium.

     

    After publishing the article, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.22 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 2 Matrix Points.

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    EXAMINE THE CHANGE IN REALITY

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.23

    It is logical to think that who you are is how you imagine yourself to be. It is reasonable to assume that you have the best assessment of your own qualities
    because, after all, you are the one with the inside knowledge. You know what is
    going on in the most intimate of your thoughts and feelings, so you would think that
    you are the best judge of your own character. As logical and reasonable as this may
    seem, it may not be true. This experiment suggest a reality check.

     

    Call up your mother, brother, sister, close friends or someone who knows you since a very long time. Tell them "I think that I have changed. Please tell me all the ways you see that I have changed. And I think there are a few things that have not changed. Please tell me also about all the ways that I have not changed." Listen.

     

    Write them all down in your Beep!Book, even if you disagree, even if you think you have done so much work on that particular thing, even if your Gremlin wants to annihilate them. When they are finished, thank them.

     

    After completing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.23 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Points.

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    USE YOUR BOX' STORIES TO MEET THE WORLD

    Matrix Code BOXTECHN.24

    Your Box is the filter between you and the vast unlimited potential of infinite possibility. It filters the possibilities for you accordingly to what assumptions, expectations, conclusions and ideas it is made out of. The filter of your Box will only allow you to see, experience and encounter situations and opportunities that fit into the Box' beliefsystem. Your Box filters the world according to the stories it has about the world.

     

    One of your Box' Technologies is to proof the stories the Box has made up. If you think "Life is hard." then you will encounter situations that proof this. If you think "There is always something to fix, always something that can go better" then you will scan for things that are broken, not working, unfullfilled. The universe will give you what you ask for.

     

    For this experiment organise an adventure day with your partner. (If you do not have a partner, go and get one.) This means go walking into town, have lunch at a café or restaurant, go to a bookstore, organise a bike ride, go swimming,...

    For the first half of the day you put on your "things are broken/life is not fair/something can always go better/scarcity"-glasses on. Notice how you immediately scan your surroundings to proof that story.

    After lunch you switch the 'glasses', the filter your Box uses into "Beauty is everywhere/life is easy/there is abundance in my life/things are in a perfectly functioning order". Notice how you immediately scan your surroundings to proof that story.

     

    From which viewpoint would you prefere to meet the world? What story would you rather carry? What is in the way for you to live in a story which empowers and supports you?

    Please write the answers to these questions and your discoveries from the day into your Beep!Book.

     

    After completing this experiment, please register Matrix Code BOXTECHN.36 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.

  • The Nothing Box

    The Nothing Box (Matrix Code YOUTUBEx.46 for StartOver.xyz)

  • NOTE: This website is a Bubble in the Bubble Map of the free-to-play, massively-multiplayer, online-and-offline, thoughtware-upgrade, matrix-building, personal-transformation, adventure-game called StartOver.xyz. It is a doorway to experiments that upgrade your thoughtware so you can create more possibility. Your knowledge is what you think about. Your thoughtware is what you use to think with. When you change your thoughtware, you go through a liquid state as your mind reorganizes itself. Liquid states can bring up transformational feelings and emotions. By upgrading your thoughtware you build matrix to hold more consciousness and leave behind a life of reactivity. No one can upgrade your thoughtware for you. No one can stop you from upgrading your thoughtware. Our theory is that when we collectively build 1,000,000 new Matrix Points we will change the morphogenetic field of the human race for the better. Please choose responsibly to read this website. Reading this whole website is worth 1 Matrix Point. Doing any of the experiments earns you additional Matrix Points. Please use Matrix Code BOXTECHN.00 to log your Matrix Point for reading this website on StartOver.xyz. Thank you for playing full out!

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